Screaming child

Recently, Nat has developed this new nasty habit of screaming at the top of her lungs when she is frustrated. Usually her frustration is caused by her brother - snatching her stuff, not listening to her instructions, or even jus touching her things.

The first time it happened (2 nights ago), we were shocked, cos it was the first time seeing her vent her frustrations this way. Later on, we learnt that she was very upset and unhappy that her brother was given something which she had asked for but was not given previously. That 'thing' was just a pear. She was throwing her tantrum on the floor, screaming her head off. I carried her up, held her, and let her continue screaming. Told her she can scream all she want if it makes her feel better. She screamed a few more times.. and finally stopped. But she was unconsolable and continued crying. Finally, Nick took over and brought her into the room for 'counselling' and she finally accepted her mistake and recognised her actions were uncalled for.

We also realised she is starting to get defiant over simple instructions.

So, it leads us to ponder.. what approach we should be adopting to handle this behaviour.

Figured that it is best to let her scream her lungs out - to vent out all her frustrations, and most importantly, not to lose our cool at her. The last thing we want is to show her a bad example, and we know screaming at her definitely doesn't help. So after she has calmed down, we manage to talk to her and explained to her why we do not like her behaviour. She seemed to accept it, which we felt was crucial.

The very next day, we heard from parents in law that Nat screamed at her brother again. Just because he touched her stuff. She was furious, and even raised her hands at him. Again, we had a talk with her, asking her why she did that. She explained she was very very angry and upset. So we went through the process of explaining and analysing her action again. This time round, emphasising that we do not want her to behave in that manner again. The next time, she will be punished.

We are worried and hope that this behavioural problem will be settled soon. It may take awhile before she finally learn to manage her anger. Meanwhile, i pray and hope that we'll be able to teach her and guide her without losing our cool.